i like going camping but i hate being eaten by bears. what's the best bearproof sleeping bag out there? would a military surplus bag be good protection?
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SF Bay Area
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sat, May 3, 2008 - 12:53 PMthe Military one won't do you any good against Bears, hell they will barely keep you warm unless you get the "New" high tech 3 piece one and again will not protect you against bears -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sat, May 3, 2008 - 1:12 PMOh damn, bad advise, bad advise, sure go ahead and buy one, not only due they protect against bear but also nuclear and biological attacks, car jackings, politicians and bums as well -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sat, May 3, 2008 - 1:28 PMcover yourself in meat. the bears will become confused and...no, wait, that doesn't work...cover your girlfriend in meat. -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sat, May 3, 2008 - 1:43 PMA sleeping bag shaped like a giant salmon. -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sat, May 3, 2008 - 4:36 PMImagine how little you would want to eat salmon if you were forced to eat it all summer long, day and night, day and night! If you make your bag smell like salmon, those bears will eat anywhere else but near you. Plus, bears are sick and tired of berries too. So, if you just spray blueberry and salmon scents all over your bag, you won't have any problems. -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sun, May 4, 2008 - 12:42 AMmmmmm, i could go for a blueberry salmon quiche right now. and cheesecake.
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sun, May 4, 2008 - 7:55 AM>Imagine how little you would want to eat salmon if you were forced to eat it all summer long, day and night, day and night!<
Yeah, like tuna. Mmmmmm tuna...
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sat, May 3, 2008 - 1:57 PMGet the Stephen Colbert Nation sleeping bag. Guaranteed to protect you from the #1 threat to America!
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sun, May 4, 2008 - 6:41 AMBears will get into almost anything, except for another bear. I suggest you sleep inside a bear so you won't get eaten by a bear. -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Mon, May 5, 2008 - 12:45 AMActually, you don't even need a bear! All you need is a smelly old rug with the word "Bear!" spray painted on the side of it. If you sleep in that, you'll be fine and the bears will keep their distance. Bonus if the rug is from an old, skanky honky-tonk.
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sun, May 4, 2008 - 7:57 AM<<i like going camping but i hate being eaten by bears>>
try camping outside of san francisco, that place is crawling with bears in leather get-ups.
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sun, May 4, 2008 - 10:20 PMI read that as Beerproof sleeping bag.
Just coat it in Scotchguard. you should be ok if you happen to spill beer.
glad I could help. -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Sun, May 4, 2008 - 10:24 PMwhy the fuck would anyone want a beerproof anything?
don't mean to be rude, i just...uh...um...i don't understand... -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Mon, May 5, 2008 - 10:03 AMLather yourself in honey.
Bears hate honey. -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Tue, May 6, 2008 - 4:39 PMFunny, my honey hates being bare. I wonder if there's a cure.
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Tue, May 6, 2008 - 4:53 PMdress up like the green bay packers. the bears won't be able to touch you. -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Wed, May 7, 2008 - 3:25 AMGeez. What's everyone's problem with bears here, anyway?
Most bears are just looking for a little love and affirmation when they come across a sleeping human.
The whole mythos of the "dangerous bear" is just a scheme propagated by the NRA. -
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Wed, May 7, 2008 - 7:07 AMForget the sleeping bag and just sleep in Ilaniowear.
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Re: bearproof sleeping bag
Wed, May 7, 2008 - 2:30 PM<<would a military surplus bag be good protection? >>
getting eaten by a bear...dental dams or plastic wrap.
and an alcohol based cleansr for the beard burn.
