Ok, so our office building is remodeling floor by floor, and they moved us from one florr to another during construction. The women's bathroom looks exactly the same as on the previous floor..... BUT.... all the toilet seats seem to be uneven: each of them is higher on the right than on the left, leaving one to an uneven sitting bathroom experience. I know it's not my ass that has changed, because other toilet seats feel even. What can I do? It's very disturbing to have one's ass higher by an inch or so on the right while trying to feel secure and concentrate on the matter at hand....
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Tue, May 13, 2008 - 9:44 AMInject cellulite into the side of your bottom that feels the toilet seat is lacking.
Besides, lopsided ass is hot this summer!
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Tue, May 13, 2008 - 10:22 AMThe men's room IS closer.... -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Tue, May 13, 2008 - 10:38 AMyou willing to pee standing up?
I think the men will complain if you don't. -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Tue, May 13, 2008 - 11:11 AMIt's an old joke, but I betcha I can pee higher on the wall than any man.....
1 rule: no hands!!!!
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Tue, May 13, 2008 - 11:24 AMgo to the nearest abortion clinic, "borrow" a third term fetus , the curled position of jr. or sara aborted will fit nicely under your ass.
be sure to flush after a couple of uses. they will flatten and begin to decompose rather quickly. they also go great with fava beans, btw. -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Tue, May 13, 2008 - 4:47 PMTypical woman, blame the toilet.
It's TOTALLY your ass. -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Tue, May 13, 2008 - 8:35 PMFigure out which ass check is decieving you and inject it with the fetus.
Dead babies solve everything. -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Wed, May 14, 2008 - 12:13 AMuse the trash can instead. or, a winter snow boot. or the security guards gun holster. -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Wed, May 14, 2008 - 3:28 AMPost a complaint to your boss and CC the email to the entire office. -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Wed, May 14, 2008 - 7:38 AMCertainly you have presentations and other important information, saved to CD's, in the office right?
Pick out the most important ones, bring them to the bathroom and put them under the uneven sides. Wala, Pee'n straight once again!! -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Wed, May 14, 2008 - 7:52 AMHmm... I think I can solve this. I'm required to give a presentation, but it can be on anything I want that's office-related. So I'll do it on the bathroom problem. I just need someone to take pictures of my ass, so I can prove it's not me....
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Wed, May 14, 2008 - 9:37 AMpublic bathrooms are gross anyway. You should go home & use your own when you feel the need. -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Wed, May 14, 2008 - 10:29 AMTell me about it! I swear, by the end of the day, that bathroom smells like a zoo. They should just scatter sawdust. -
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Re: The Weirdest Thing....
Wed, May 14, 2008 - 10:59 PM... all sounds like great material for your presentation!
Power point?
Remember to take some photos - images really help bring a presentation all together.
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