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... yeah, we all know. But here's my problem:
I live in Santa Barbara and now the news helicopters and tourists will start bothering me with all their goddamn idol worship. And I hear they plan to have some sort of open casket memorial up at his Neverland Ranch in Santa Ynez this Friday or Saturday.
So what should I tell them when they ask for directions and stuff?
I live in Santa Barbara and now the news helicopters and tourists will start bothering me with all their goddamn idol worship. And I hear they plan to have some sort of open casket memorial up at his Neverland Ranch in Santa Ynez this Friday or Saturday.
So what should I tell them when they ask for directions and stuff?
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California
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 1, 2009 - 1:31 PMThe only BAD advice I have for you is to tell them exactly where it is.
Otherwise, the crazier the better (like how about over the edge of that cliff over there?). -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 1, 2009 - 2:05 PMpunch each and every one of them right in the face. -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 1, 2009 - 2:12 PMgrab your crotch, tilt your hat, Scream "OOOOHH" and point your other hand in the correct direction! -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 1, 2009 - 3:06 PM1.steel jacksons body
2 tie strings to his head arms and leggs
3 make him a puppit
4 take him on his tour
5 call it the ''i lied about bing dead tour''
6 make a mint
7 blow it all on hookers in vegas
to much? -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 1, 2009 - 3:11 PMhe should be preserved in a perpetual open casket like Eva Peron or Lenin.
Or maybe people can start selling bits of him in lockets and stuff, like they do with saints and parts of the cross. -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 1, 2009 - 7:06 PMStart selling Michael Jackson Holy Land vials of dirt on the 700 club.
You don't have to push through the glassy-eyed thralls at Neverland to get some, just do what Pat Robertson does: any ol' potting soil or dogcrap will do. -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 1, 2009 - 9:04 PMPatric
what a great idea,,,,, im thinking ebay -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 1, 2009 - 10:08 PMthe worst advice I can offer is to make Diana Ross the executor of your children!
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Thu, July 2, 2009 - 12:17 PMToo bad Billy Mays is dead too - he could certainly move those sales!
AND for ONLY $19.95 you receive NOT ONLY HAIR of the DEAD MICHAEL JACKSON in a GLASS LOCKET, BUT a vail of FUN WATER from the NEVERLAND PLAYLAND!!!! WHAT COULD BE MORE FUN FUN FUN than NEVERLAND WATER?!!! -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Thu, July 2, 2009 - 12:26 PMand if you act in the next hour you will also receive the michael jackson ''how to really REALLY love kids''
so grab your crotch and call today. -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Thu, July 2, 2009 - 1:35 PM1-900-666-1212. Øperators are standing by...
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Fri, July 3, 2009 - 11:44 AMSet up a Jesus Juice popcicle stand and be sure to serve them up with a sequined glove on one hand and hold your crotch with the other hand.Throw in a hip thrust every now and then as you bite down on your lower lip and make passes at all the pre-pubecent boys. -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Sat, July 4, 2009 - 4:33 AMkdkatt-
Those Jesus Juice popsicles should be shaped like his wang. One in ten contains an actual pubic hair. -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Sat, July 4, 2009 - 9:02 AMThis is the BAD advice tribe!
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Sun, July 5, 2009 - 9:11 AMHe's not dead, He's resting. Probably tuckered out after a prolonged squawk. There, you stunned 'im, just as he was wakin' up! They stun easily, the Jackson 5 do! Probably pining for the Fjords! -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Sun, July 5, 2009 - 9:21 AMif only montyphython where on tv today :-)
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Sun, July 5, 2009 - 1:11 PMJust tell them they look a whole lot older, fatter, and drunker in person.
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Tue, July 14, 2009 - 8:41 PM"Michael Jackson is dead..."
It just doesn't have the same ring to it as James Brown did -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Tue, July 14, 2009 - 8:53 PMRick James is Dead doesn't do it either. However, Aaliyah is Dead might work with an industrial beat behind it. -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Tue, July 14, 2009 - 11:34 PMMichael Jackson is dead? what!
when did this happen and why was i not informed? really peaple you just cant hide things like this from the rest of us. -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 15, 2009 - 3:50 AMMichael Jackson is very much alive and living in Pittsburgh. The whole thing is just a vast media conspiracy to convince you that the moon walk really happened. -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 15, 2009 - 9:55 AMit's true, But I'm told he's shacked up on some island with Elvis and 2Pac -
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Re: Michael Jackson is dead...
Wed, July 15, 2009 - 11:36 AMi know that island , Senator Kennedy found that island for his brothers to live on, after jim morrison move there the island really became the place to die for.
Kennedys girl friend lives there as well, you can get to the island vea underwater car ride ---------dont forget to roll up the windows if you want to stay dry:-)
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